Thursday, November 19, 2009

Top Stand Up Comedians

From all the stand up comedy that I have watched, this is the list of comics that I have. The list is arranged in the descending order - from the best to the so-so and less.
[Wherever I could recollect, the name of the show that I have seen them in is also added]

1. Bernie Mac - The Original Kings of Comedy, Def Comedy Jam
2. DL Hugely - The Original Kings of Comedy, Def Comedy Jam,
3. Steve Harvey - The Original Kings of Comedy
4. Cedric the Entertainer - The Original Kings of Comedy
[Mentioned at the top because the whole show - The Original Kings of Comedy, is simply, just simply, hilarious]
5. Mitch Hedberg - Mitch Hedberg Special
6. Chris Rock - Bring the Pain, Bigger and Blacker, Kill the Messenger, Never Scared
7. Richard Pryor - Random clips
8. George Carlin - Random clips
9. Rowan Atkinson - Rowan Atkinson: Live
10. Robin Williams - Reality, What A Concept; Robin Williams: Live on Broadway
11. Bill Maher - Be More Cynical, Victory Begins At Home
12. Dave Gorman - Googlewhack adventures
13. Eddie Murphy - Random clips
14. Dylan Moran - Monster
15. Earthquake - One Night Stand, About Goddamn Time
16. Lewis Black - Red, White and Screwed; Black on Broadway
17. Zach Galifianakis - Purple onion, Between Two Ferns
18. Chris Tucker - Random clips
19. Russel Peters - New york central: Live; Red, White and Brown
20. Jeff Dunham - Spark Of Insanity
21. Robert Schimmel - Unprotected
22. Dave Chappele - For what its worth
23. Jo Koy - Jo Koy Special
24. Pablo Fransisco - Bits and Pieces
25. Katt Williams - American Hustle
26. Joe Rogan - Joe Rogan: Live
27. Jerry Seinfeld - from Seinfeld
28. Brian Regan, Demen Martin, Jim Gaffigan, Sebastian Maniscalco - Comedy Central
29. Dane Cook - The Insomniac Tour, Vicious Circle
30. Carlos Mencia - Take A Joke America; Mind of Mencia, No Strings Attached

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Conference Proceedings

About the conference:
SVUG - System Verilog User Group Conference.
Taj Residency .
Wednesday.
11th of November, 2009.

[Prologue: The conference was great. I could actually understand what was being explained almost completely, and that is a rare occurrence during conferences in general. Till lunch it was mostly an introduction to System Verilog and its uses for designers and in verification. Post lunch was mostly on OVM - Open Verification Methodology. Since that was methodology was alien, it was not as interesting as the first session was . But in general the latter half too was appreciated and was received with as much attention.]

Excerpts from the notes that I jotted down during the talks follow. They are mostly one liners from, C. Cummings, the speaker who delivered the brilliant talks in the first session:

[At the beginning of his talk, second point in his second slide]
I would like you all to sit back and listen and not interrupt me at all throughout the presentation.... NOT!!

[On adding assertions to legacy code using bind]
But if your mother and I ever catch you using the bind command to instantiate modules, we will be very angry with you.

[On using bind files properly]
Start using outputs in bind files, then the designer will have very unkind words for you.

[On using macros in defining assertions]
I introduced macros for assertions mostly for the designers. Because they are lazy.... C'mon, you know its true.

[On a question asked in a very low voice, after the talk]
You need to be more assertive when you speak, or we need to get you a mike.

[When his computer switched off suddenly]
I think the laptop feels it will work better with the power cord connected.

[During the time it took to restart]
I can do hand puppets till the comp boots...
[Laughs heard all around]
It doesn't matter anyway. It was only a summary slide.

[When the booting took even longer]
We can take questions from the audience now, without any distractions on the screen... Not that it is my choice.

[Announcing lunch after the talks slightly ate into the lunch time, and people were fidgeting]
I guess there is some food available to the left of this room. I think you can go and have some. I mean, only if anyone really wants to.

[End of the conference, while calling out the name of the last of 5 persons who'd won OVM code books on a lucky draw, after the others called out company first and first letter of the person's name before calling it out entirely]
Since it has become a routine...
Ok.. How many of you are from Flextora*?
[Three hands go up]
Ok.. Does your name start with K?
[One hand goes down]
Does your name have a vowel in it?
[Laughs heard all round]

PS: There were other one-liners too. Most of these would have worked better if one had actually been there.
PPS: The lunch was great. So were the drinks and snacks at the end of the conference
PPPS: Day well spent.

Reasons, Cycling and the Big Banyan Tree

Mostly because of the fact that I presently, as of this moment, have completely exhausted all the anime I had, both good, not-so-good, can't be in the vicinity of the word 'good'; and also because of other smaller things like the fact that I haven't written anything in a very long time; and I just finished Chetan Bhagat's latest dish out - 2 States - and figured, if something like that can get published into a book, the world is prepared to take a post like this any day; general boredom, a really unsteady internet connection from the last two days, and a blank notepad file in front of me, this post comes into existence.

Mostly because of the fact that Sagar(evilsense) bought a new cycle; and also because of other smaller things like it being a three day weekend; more than just two interested people; more than just one new bicycle; not too bad weather plus no rain, Diwali and with it the hope that there would be more than just vehicles on the street, for instance, stuff like crackers etc. ; myself, evilsense and Sarvesh(sakku) decided to go on a one day cycling trip a few weekends ago.

Mostly because after meeting up near Attiguppe, which is, according to Google Maps, almost in the middle from my house(Shankarmutt) and Sakku's(Rajarajeshwarinagar) and travelling along Bangalore University, NLS etc and reaching Sarvesh's place for brunch, we had no distinct routes chalked out to cycle, we thought we would generally ride the outskirts and catch any pools/water-logged areas/other buildings of note along the way - and in the process of doing so reached Kengeri.

Mostly because even after meeting with few relatives of mine in Kengeri and discussing options about nearby places to cycle, the only place that was at a ride-able distance and could be accepted as a tourist spot with some value was the Big Banyan Tree, we found ourselves there at around 2 in the afternoon after about a 7 km uphill climb off Mysore road.

Mostly because the grass was green and so inviting, and our thighs and behinds had known better times, general tiredness, several monkeys that seemed to mind their own business, a vantage place to keep an eye on our bicycles - since two of them didn't have proper locks - and one didn't have a lock at all, a huge canopy overhead by the one single huge banyan tree which blocked most of the sunlight and made the place around real cool, not too many interesting females walking around- the power nap for the next hour felt great.

Mostly because we still had time to kill after, and one of us remembered that we did pack a camera, and a general interest to see what the fuss about the tree was all about, to check out the graffiti on the bark - some of those signatures in impossible places on the tree; and because the single tree sprawled over 4 acres by itself; and the hope that there might be some of the above-mentioned females around; we walked through and around the tree.

Mostly because the guard-person had got tired of telling people off about things they should not be doing - which on later realization, he probably had mugged from the huge list that was displayed on a board with a green background - at the entrance of the tree; or probably he was just bored; he told us a few details about the tree - details which I could have done better justice to if I'd written this post earlier - about how this was the second biggest banyan tree in India, how the existing Shiva temple in the center was the place where the original trunk was, how it was over 450 years old, and it has some 2000 odd off-shoots that are twined together and nurtured, so that they can continue to grow, about the 4.5 odd acres, and other such numbers and data I can't quite seem to recollect now.

Mostly because the above-mentioned hope wasn't held up, and the realization that we were about 25 odd kilometers away from my house and similar two digit numbers to the others'; and the fact that the thighs and the behinds were starting to get accustomed to the walking on the ground; and the fact that it was Diwali which expects some attendance in the house when one is in the same city; we cycled back - sagar, sakku and me and reached home - in that order.

Mostly because this has gone on longer than I thought it would, I am ending the post here.

PS:
Raw data:
1. Total distance in one day = Over 50 km
2. Date = October 17th, 2009
3. Start time = 7:00 am
4. End time = 6:00 pm (4:45 pm- 6:00 pm)
5. Cycles used =
  • Mine: Cannon barrel: Bought Jan 1, 1996, Cycle seat inserted on 16th Oct, 2009.
  • Sagar: Hero - New Age Hawk. Bought 2009
  • Sarvesh: Hercules Ryders. Bought 2009
6. Exact route taken* = (insert Google Map snapshot here if it is ever taken)
7. A few random pics* = (Just the one actually)8. Previous cycling trips = The Bicycle Diaries

*reasons heartily used to delay the post

About the Big Banyan Tree:
1. Size = 4.5 - 5 acres
2. Age = 450 odd years
3. How to reach: Drive on Mysore Road beyond Kengeri, take a deviation to the right at Kumbalagod junction and proceed for 7 km. If approaching from Magadi Road, turn left at a spot with a clear indication between Tavarekere and Chennenahalli, and continue for about 6 km.